Related:

• A Letter from your mama... Dear Son: I'm writing this letter slow because I know you can't read fast.
  We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home, so we moved....
• Placing Blame This 85 year old couple, having been married almost 60 years, had died in = a car crash.
  They had been in good health the last ten years mainly due to her interest in health food, and exercise....
• WE CAN'T STAND AMERICANS 1. Because they come up here in the summer, wearing funny clothes and carrying skis on the tops of their station wagons.
  2. Because they never have anything but American money with them and they never change it at a bank and they complain about the exchange rate they get at stores....
• Dear Son, I am writing this slow, 'cause I know you can't read fast.
  There are a few things happening here at home. We don't live where we did when you left -- you're father read in the paper that most car accidents happen within twenty miles of home, so we moved....
• A Letter From A Redneck Mother To Her Daughter Dear Child
  I am writing this slow because I know that you can't read fast....
• How about that footage on the news yesterday of our new Commander-in- Chief on the deck of the aircraft carrier (Teddy Roosevelt?
  ).. After throwing one of his snappy salutes (he's *almost* got that down), I half expected him to give the order, "Let's turn this thang around....
• Why is a calendar so sad? Because its days are numbered.
• A 5-year-old girl gets a kitten for her birthday. Soon thereafter, the Mom, while getting into the car slams the door on the kitten, killing it in front of her daughter.
  Mom explains that "this is life", accidents happen, we learn from our mistakes, and so on....
• Unknown From: SilkyKW There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world.
  However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the Population Reference Bureau)....