The Top 5 New Problems for Mike Tyson 15> Fight controversy may adversely affect pro wrestling career.

The Top 5 New Problems for Mike Tyson

15> Fight controversy may adversely affect pro wrestling career.

14> Upcoming TV special with Martha Stewart in doubt.

13> That constant ringing in his mouth.

12> Spock vs. Tyson bout hastily cancelled.

11> Can't decide between the Crest & Tom's of Maine endorsement
deals.

10> Kids really start to freak out whenever he tries to play
"Got Your Nose."

9> New nickname of "Nipsy" less intimidating than "Iron Mike."

8> Has absolutely no idea how to handle his next opponent,
Vinny "No Ears" Bottatucci.

7> Nobel people called -- they want their peace prize back.

6> Saturday: Bite some guy's ear off. Sunday: Ozzy Osbourne
won't stop pestering you to go for a drink.

5> Willing opponents now down to Vincent Van Gogh and
J.Paul Getty, Jr.

4> Don King, fearing a loss of credibility, ups commission
from 98 to 99%

3> ASPCA has yet to approve match with Marmaduke.

2> He's starting to make O.J. look respectable.


and the Number 1 New Problem for Mike Tyson...


1> Recurring fantasies about Ross Perot and Prince Charles.


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