This Nice, Old Jewish Man Really Wanted To Win The Lottery.

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This nice, old Jewish man really wanted to win the lottery. So, one
week, he goes to synagogue and he says (good Yiddish accent mandatory),
"Oy, Lord of heaven and earth, imagine how much good I
could do with ze money I vould vin if I von the lottery! Imagine how
much charity I could give! Help me vin the lottery and I will spent
ze money wisely!" He doesn't win the lottery.

The next week, he goes to synagogue again and says, "Oh, lord of
heaven and earth, you must not have heard me last veek! Imagine how
many lives I could make easier with ze money from ze lottery! Help me
vin ze lottery!" Once again, he doesn't win.

The third week, he goes to synagogue again and prays in a similar
vein. Suddenly, he hears a voice from the heavens: "Help me, help

He says, "Lord of heaven and earth, what can I do to help you?"

"Buy a ticket!"