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• If there's one thing America needs, it's more lawyers. -- Lionel Hutz, "Marge in Chai
• Hutz: Hutz is the name, Mr. Simpson. Lionel Hutz, attorney at law.
  Here's my card. It turns into a sponge when you put it in water....
• So, Mr. Nahasapeemapetilon, if that your real name.
  .. -- Lionel Hutz cross-examines Apu, "Marge in Chai...
• Marge: Oh, that's it: I'm going to write you a ticket.
  Homer: But Marge! We're family. Marge: You're breaking the law....
• Lionel Hutz, Attorney at Law. I'm filing a class-action suit against the director on behalf of everyone who was cut from the play.
  I also play Mitch! -- Conflict of interest? "A Streetcar Named Marge...
• Lionel Hutz, attorney-at-law. What's that, a broken neck?
  Great! -- Chasing a gurney down the corridor, "Bart Gets Hit by a Ca...
• Lisa: You're a latter-day Clarence Darrow! Hutz: Uh, was he the black guy on the Mod Squad?
  -- No, he's the black guy on the Supreme Court, "Marge in Chai...
• Oh, sure, like lawyers work in big skyscrapers and have secretaries.
  Look at him! He's wearing a belt. [wistfully] That's Hollywood for ya....
• Troy: [voiceover] When Homer sold his soul for a donut, he found Hell isn't all it's cracked up to be in these never-before broadcast scenes.
  [a demon selects Homer's head from several and grips it] [he rolls it down an alley as Homer's head screams] [it hits the spiked pins and breaks open, revealing a note...