Grampa: All right, son, I'll sell this dump and write you a check.
Homer: Dad, first you gave me life, now you've given me a home for my
family, I'd be honored if you came to live with us.
Grampa: Thank you!
Bart: [in the present] So how long before you shipped Grampa off to
the old-folks home?
Homer: About three weeks.
[everyone laughs]
-- "Lisa's First Word"
Homer: Dad, first you gave me life, now you've given me a home for my
family, I'd be honored if you came to live with us.
Grampa: Thank you!
Bart: [in the present] So how long before you shipped Grampa off to
the old-folks home?
Homer: About three weeks.
[everyone laughs]
-- "Lisa's First Word"
Related:
- Marge: You know, <we'll> be old someday.
Homer: Gasp!
My God, you're right, Marge! You kids wouldn't put... - Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness,
feel the slippery finish. Caresses it, experience it... - Homer: Dad, how come you never gave me any encouragement?
Maybe I could have been something more than... - Homer: I need $15,000 to buy a home.
Grampa: Oh, well.
All I own is this house that I built with my own two... - Homer: Welcome to the Simpson residence or "casa de Simpson," as I
call it.
Grimes: Yeah, what did you want to see me about,... - Homer: So... how about those rainbow suspenders, huh?
Bart: Dad...? Homer: Pretty cool way to keep your pants... - Grampa: Son, it's me! I floated up toward Heaven but got lost along
the way.
Homer: [gasps] Dad, is that really you? Grampa... - Homer: I can't tell you how sorry I am, Dad.
Grampa:
Is someone talking to me? I didn't hear anything.... - Malloy: Homer, old chap, well done. If anyone was going to catch me,
I'm glad it was you. Homer: Actually, it wasn't me...
From the same category:
- Nick: Troy, I brought with me the gravestone of author and troubled soul
Edgar Allen Poe!
[exhibits a grimy tombstone] Troy: One of our best... - Mr. B: There is a wonderful girl's future at stake.
Homer: Well, if she's so wonderful, give her an A!... - Homer: My tux is going to have the widest lapels, the most
ruffles,
and the highest platform shoes you ever saw! Marge... - I tried to repel him, I really did!
-- Patty to Selma,
on Principal Skinner, "Principal... - Largo: It's your turn, Jimbo.
Jimbo: [steps up with tambourine,
hits it once] Unh! Largo: Hmm, someone's been practicing...
