Related:

• Apu, you can take this job and restaff it!
  -- Homer quits his job at the Kwik-E-Mart, "Lisa's Pony...
• Homer: Oh, I need money. Apu: Well, if you need money, you should have at least jammed a gun in my ribs, or better yet, you could inquire about my help-wanted sign.
  Homer: You're looking for help? Apu: Yes, we need someone for the demanding yet high-profile midnight to 8am shift....
• Homer, you are asleep at your post! Now go change the expiration dates on the dairy products!
  -- Apu, "Lisa's Pony...
• Apu: I won't lie to you. On this job, you <will> be shot at.
  [reveals his chest] Each of these bullet wounds is a badge of honor....
• Oh my! What is that smell! [sees Homer] Oh, it's you. -- Pet shop owner, "Lisa's Pony
• Smithers: You have any collateral? Burns: Oh, Smithers, let's not be so cold.
  His spirit is my collateral. -- Approving Homer's loan to pay for "Lisa's Pony...
• Paul: What? She's leaving home? Lisa: Wow! Paul McCartney!
  I read about you in history class. So where's your wife Linda?...
• Lisa: I gave up the pony. Homer: You did? Lisa: Mm hm.
  There's a big, dumb animal I love even more than that horse....
• Lisa: The whole world wants me to eat meat. I can't fight it anymore.
  [She musters her resolve and bites into a hot dog....