Related:

• Smithers: Hey, Simpson, Burns wants to talk to you privately.
  Homer: [still speaking through the megaphone] Privately?...
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• I was going 70 miles an hour and got stopped by a cop who said, "Do you know the speed limit is 55 miles per hour?
  Yes, officer, but I wasn't going to be out that long..." -- Steven Wrigh...
• I got pulled over by a cop, and he said, 'do you know the speed limit here is 50 miles per hour?
  '. So I said, 'oh, that's OK, I'm not going that far.'. -- Stephen Wrigh...
• Your lives are in the hands of men no smarter than you or I, many of them incompetent boobs.
  I know this because I worked alongside them, gone bowling with them, watched them pass me over for promotions time and again....
• Unlike most of you, I am not a nut. -- Homer Simpson Homer's Odyssey
• Mrs. B: This year's topic is `Resolved: The national speed limit should be lowered to 55 miles per hour.
  ' Homer: 55? That's ridiculous! Sure, it'll save a few lives, but millions will be late!...
• Lisa: [sobs] Mom, this is really scary. I'm going to get my first F ever.
  Marge: Cheer up! So you're not good at sports: it's a very small part of life....
• Homer: Boy! This intersection is dangerous. Someone oughta put a stop sign here.
  [a beam of sunlight graces Homer's face] Marge: Oh, Homer, how could think of killing yourself?...