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• Bart: I'll take up smoking and give that up. Home
  Good for you, son. Giving up smoking is one of the hardest things you'll ever have to do....
• Burns: But they're so wretchedly adorable. 25 little Rory Calhouns.
  ..I can't do it. But I can kill you. [Lisa whimpers like a puppy] No, I can't kill you either....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Lisa: Why don't you go see Grampa? Bart: What can &l
  he> do? Lisa: He'll give you good advice. He's the toughest Simpson alive....
• Homer: Welcome to the Simpson residence or "casa de Simpson," as I call it.
  Grimes: Yeah, what did you want to see me about, Simpson?...
• Marge: Now, I know we love the puppies very much, but I think they're getting to be a problem.
  Bart: Yeah, they ate all my socks. I have to wear Lisa's to school today....
• Homer: Lisa, honey, are you going to be OK? Lisa: Bleeding Gums was my hero and I never got to tell him how I felt.
  Homer: Oh, I'm sure he knew, and I'm sure that wherever he is now, he's happy....
• Bart: I'd do anything to go to that show! Homer: I'd sell my first-born son!
  Bart: Hey! Homer: You'll do as you're told!...
• Homer: I'd give anything to get into the Stonecutters.
  Lisa: What do they do there, Dad? Abe: I'm a member -- Home...