Hutz: My client's film predates all of those things your Honor.
Lawyer: Oh _yes_! I've forgotten! Your famous film, the one you
destroyed before the trial and haven't been able to find
another copy of! Oh yes, _that_ film.
Hutz: Yes. You don't have a copy, do you?
-- The first lesson of Law 101: Bring your _own_
evidence, "The Day the Violence Died"
Lawyer: Oh _yes_! I've forgotten! Your famous film, the one you
destroyed before the trial and haven't been able to find
another copy of! Oh yes, _that_ film.
Hutz: Yes. You don't have a copy, do you?
-- The first lesson of Law 101: Bring your _own_
evidence, "The Day the Violence Died"
Related:
- Judge: Mr. Hutz, we've been in here for four hours.
Do you have any evidence at all? Hutz: Well... - Lawyer: Krusty, have you _ever_ seen this so-called animation genius
before?
Krusty: Yes I have. Lawyer: [surprised] You have?... - Bart: Keep the trial going, I'll be right back.
Hutz:
Your Honor, I'd like to call all of my surprise witnesses... - Hutz: Are you saying, _under oath_ Mr. Myers, that your father didn't
steal any of the characters associated with your studio?
Myers: Well, I don't think I _am_ under oath, but.... - Hutz: All right, gentlemen, I'll take your case. But I'm going to have
to ask for a thousand-dollar retainer.
Bart: A thousand dollars? But your ad says "No money... - Marge: I'm Marge Simpson, and I have an idea.
Everyone:
Aw, no. Marge is going to say something. etc. Marge... - Burns: Now before we begin, let me make one thing clear for you.
I want your legal advice. I even pay for it. But... - Hutz: Good news, Bart: the Krusty O Cereal Corp. has settled your case
for $100,000,
less, of course, my legal fees. Bart: [suspicious]... - Naches (rhymes with Bach' us, with "Bach" pronounced like the composer)
is what every Jewish parent wants from their children,
lots of good returns, good grades, good spouse, good...
