Guard: Stand behind the yellow line! You will now receive your
Christmas presents donated by the Port Authority lost and found
office.
[the bullies move forward one at a time to a laundry slot]
Pass your chit to Santa to receive your gift. If you do not
have a chit, you will not receive a gift.
Jimbo: Wow! The March 8th newspaper.
Nelson: Cool! A book of carpet samples.
Bart: [crosses fingers] Come on, new bike!
[drops chit in slot]
[groans] Ohh, a soiled wig.
Santa: [through a speaker] Merry Christmas and a happy new year.
-- Bart's juvenile hall fantasy, "Marge Be Not Proud"
Christmas presents donated by the Port Authority lost and found
office.
[the bullies move forward one at a time to a laundry slot]
Pass your chit to Santa to receive your gift. If you do not
have a chit, you will not receive a gift.
Jimbo: Wow! The March 8th newspaper.
Nelson: Cool! A book of carpet samples.
Bart: [crosses fingers] Come on, new bike!
[drops chit in slot]
[groans] Ohh, a soiled wig.
Santa: [through a speaker] Merry Christmas and a happy new year.
-- Bart's juvenile hall fantasy, "Marge Be Not Proud"
Related:
- Brodka: Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Simpson? This is detective Don Brodka from
Try-N-Save security.
That's right, Don Brodka. Your son Bart has... - Lisa: Hey, I thought Krusty was Jewish.
Bart: Christmas is a time when people of _all_ religions come together
to worship Jesus Christ.
[on TV, a commercial for a really violent video game... - Have you ever started a chain reaction by dropping
your bike onto a line of parked bikes?' (+3) Did you... - Marge: A tattoo?
Homer: A what?
Bart: Yeah, they're cool,
and they last for the rest of your lives. Marge: You... - Merry Christmas and Happy
New Year... - Milstead's Christmas Card Rule: After you've mailed your last
card,
you will receive a card from someone you overlooked... - Homer: Lesse, I'll have four tax burgers, one IRS-wich,
withhold the lettuce, four dependent-sized sodas... - Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness,
feel the slippery finish. Caresses it, experience it... - You will receive money for nothing,
and your chicks for free...
