Bart: If you gain 61 pounds they'll let you work at home?
Homer: Y'uh huh, that's the deal. No more exercise program, no more
traffic, no more blood drives or charity walks.
Bart: Dad, I know we don't do a lot together but helping you gain 61
pounds is something I want to be a part of.
[Lisa swings here chair around, unexpectedly appearing.]
Lisa: Dad!
Homer: [frightened] Aah!
Lisa: I must protest. You're abusing a program intended to help the
unfortunate.
Homer: Hee hee hee, I'm not saying it isn't sleazy, honey, but try to
see it my way: all my life I've been an obese man trapped inside
a fat man's body.
Lisa: Have you told Mom about this?
Homer: No, it would only worry her. If you want to add to her worries,
go ahead. I guess _I'm_ just a little more grateful for all the
things she's done for us.
-- Backwards rationalizing, "King-Size Homer"
