Homer: Look, I know I'm not witty like that critic guy, but does he know
_all_ the words to the Oscar Mayer song?
Jay: [walking past, singing] Oh, I wish I were an Oscar Mayer weiner,
[Bart and Lisa join in] That is what I'd truly like to be.
'Cause if I were an Oscar Mayer weiner,
[Jay solos out of tune] Everyone would be in love with me!
[SLH howls]
Homer: That's it, Marge: he knows the whole hot dog song! Go ahead,
sleep with him. I'll just take a lock of your hair to remember
you by. [snips one from her] It's just me and you now, lock of
hair.
Marge: You don't have to do this.
Homer: Yeah? Well you think I'm stupid!
Marge: I don't think you're stupid.
Homer: Prove it! Put me on that film jury festival thing.
Marge: [resigned] Fine, you're on the jury.
[crosses off "Martin Scorsese", writes in "Homer"]
-- So close for Scorsese and yet so far,
"A Star is Burns"
_all_ the words to the Oscar Mayer song?
Jay: [walking past, singing] Oh, I wish I were an Oscar Mayer weiner,
[Bart and Lisa join in] That is what I'd truly like to be.
'Cause if I were an Oscar Mayer weiner,
[Jay solos out of tune] Everyone would be in love with me!
[SLH howls]
Homer: That's it, Marge: he knows the whole hot dog song! Go ahead,
sleep with him. I'll just take a lock of your hair to remember
you by. [snips one from her] It's just me and you now, lock of
hair.
Marge: You don't have to do this.
Homer: Yeah? Well you think I'm stupid!
Marge: I don't think you're stupid.
Homer: Prove it! Put me on that film jury festival thing.
Marge: [resigned] Fine, you're on the jury.
[crosses off "Martin Scorsese", writes in "Homer"]
-- So close for Scorsese and yet so far,
"A Star is Burns"
Related:
- Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness,
feel the slippery finish. Caresses it, experience it... - Marge: I knew this would happen. I put you on the jury and you vote
for the stupidest film.
Homer: I have every right to be on that jury, even... - Marge: [writing] "Dear Mr. Sherman, on behalf of the people of
Springfield I would like to invite you to judge our film
festival.
[cut to Jay reading the letter in New York] ... - Marge: Lisa needs to go to the museum tomorrow,
and I think you should take her.
Homer: Museum? Tomorrow? Oh, oh, Marge, I'd love... - Homer: Marge? Since I'm not talking to Lisa, would you please ask her
to pass me the syrup?
Marge: [Wearily] Dear, please pass your father the... - Homer: This is my quest. I'm like that guy. That Spanish guy.
You know, he fought the windmill... Marge: Don Quixote... - Marge: Homer, I really don't like you telling personal secrets in your
class.
Homer: Marge, I didn't tell 'em personal stuff. Marge... - Homer: You know, Marge, for the first time in our marriage I can finally
look down my nose at you.
_You_ have a gambling problem! Marge: That's true.... - Homer: {Whoa, whoa, whoa -- let me get this straight.
They let everybody out of school early just...
From the same category:
- Waiter: So what's it going to be, me little buck-o?
Bart: A-huh-ha-hmm, let's see... [examines the menu]... - Bob: Aah, for the days when aviation was a gentleman's pursuit -
back before every Joe Sweatsock could wedge himself... - Bart: I can't believe I've gotta spend all my free time dusting doilies
in a smelly run-down dump for a creepy old witch.
[pulls a curtain, behind which we see a number of scantily... - Marge: Honey, $750 is a lot of money. We really can't afford this
operation.
Bart: You're gonna just let him [SLH] die? Marge:... - Swim, play tennis, or just sit and stare at the walls.
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