Lisa: [walking in] Bart, you can't actually _call_ these places.
Don't you know how expensive international calls are?
Bart: [dials] Hello, Operator? I'd like to make a collect call to
[in Australia, a phone rings; a koala electrocutes itself]
Operator: This is the international operator. Will you accept a collect
call from --
Bart: [lowering voice] Uh, yes. Uh, ahem, this is Dr. Bart Simpson
of the International Drainage Commission. It's an emergency.
Tobias: If it's an emergency, then.
Bart: We understand some drains in your area have been
malfunctioning, sucking in people and...whatnot.
Tobias: Willikers! That's awful.
Bart: [gravely] Indeed. We need you to check your sinks and toilets
and tell us which way the water is going, and please! Stand
clear.
[Tobias checks sink and toilet]
Tobias: [breathless] The fixtures...they're all draining clockwise,
Sir!
Bart: D'oh, she was right, stupid Lisa science queen.
-- Bart forgets his sisters' mental superiority,
"Bart vs. Australia"
Don't you know how expensive international calls are?
Bart: [dials] Hello, Operator? I'd like to make a collect call to
[in Australia, a phone rings; a koala electrocutes itself]
Operator: This is the international operator. Will you accept a collect
call from --
Bart: [lowering voice] Uh, yes. Uh, ahem, this is Dr. Bart Simpson
of the International Drainage Commission. It's an emergency.
Tobias: If it's an emergency, then.
Bart: We understand some drains in your area have been
malfunctioning, sucking in people and...whatnot.
Tobias: Willikers! That's awful.
Bart: [gravely] Indeed. We need you to check your sinks and toilets
and tell us which way the water is going, and please! Stand
clear.
[Tobias checks sink and toilet]
Tobias: [breathless] The fixtures...they're all draining clockwise,
Sir!
Bart: D'oh, she was right, stupid Lisa science queen.
-- Bart forgets his sisters' mental superiority,
"Bart vs. Australia"
Related:
- Bruno: Nine hundred dollary-doos? Tobias! Did you accept a six hour
collect call from the States?
Tobias: It was an emergency call from the International... - Bart: Look, why don't you just check your neighbor's drains?
I'll hold. [Tobias rides trike... - Bart: [sleepy] Hello?
Bruno: Right! I'm calling all the way from Squatter's Crog,
Australia and I want to speak to, er, Dr. Bart... - Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness,
feel the slippery finish. Caresses it, experience it... - Bart: Go, toothpaste, go! Move your pasty white butt.
Lisa: Come on, shampoo! You can do it! [both... - Bart: Hello, Southern hemisphere? Which way does the water go in your
toilet?
Man 1: [sighs] Just a minute, I'll check. [walks... - Lisa: Bart, water will only go the other way in the Southern hemisphere.
Bart: What the hell is the "Southern hemisphere"? Lisa... - Doll: Trust in yourself and you can achieve anything!
Lisa: All right. Now all we need is a name. Bart... - Lisa: Hey, I need that! [grabs her saxophone]
[looks at letters in garbage] Office of the Solicitor General?
Office of the Prime Minister? Hopping Mad Collection...
