Related:

• Lisa: [sigh] I've got to stop being so petty. I should be Alison's friend, not her competitor.
  I mean...she is a wonderful person... Bart: Way to go, Lis....
• Lisa: Aah! It's the beating of that hideous heart!
  [everyone looks at her] I mean, I think I hear something....
• Lisa: Hi, Alison, I'm Lisa Simpson. Oh, it's great to finally meet someone who converses above the normal eight-year-old level.
  Alison: Actually, I'm seven. I was just skipped ahead because I was getting bored with the first grade....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Lisa: Oh, who am I kidding? There's no _way_ I'm ever going to beat Alison.
  Bart: Sure there is! ...but it involves being a bit underhanded, a bit devious, a bit -- as the French say -- Bartesque....
• Bart: Sorry I froze you out Lis, I, I just didn't want the guys to think I'd gone soft on the girl issue.
  Lisa: [sighs] I'm tired of being an issue, Bart....
• Lisa: I can't believe it, Bart. I'd always thought Jessica was so sweet!
  Bart: She's like a Milk Dud, Lis: sweet on the outside, poison on the inside....
• Marge: My, these seas are certainly heaving. Pirate
  Well, no more than your bountiful bosom, [sly] milady....
• Lisa: Well, I gotta go. I have to practice for band auditions.
  Alison: Me too! Hey, what instrument do you play?...