Related:

• How often do lesbian vampires meet? Every 28 days!
• It's 11:00 o'clock. Do you know what your cats are shredding?
• We are going out! But we shall do it as proper vampires!
• Do not kiss an elephant on the lips today.
• Its 11 PM and you aren't home. Do you know what your cats are shredding?
• How many vampires -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None, they *like* it in the dark....
• Bart: Hmm, I wonder where Jimbo is today? He should have beaten us up for our lunch money an hour ago.
  Uter: [cutting in line] Oh, lunch lady? Please to have another sloppy Jimbo?...
• How do I turn the other cheek without getting up?
• Printer - An electromechanical paper-shredding device.