Related:

• Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happinesss is assured.
  Ambrose Bierce, (1842-1914)...
• CLERGYMAN, n. A man who undertakes the management of our spiritual affairs as a method of better his temporal ones.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• AFRICAN, n. A nigger that votes our way. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary
• CAVILER, n. A critic of our own work. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary
• MONSIGNOR, n. A high ecclesiastical title, of which the Founder of our religion overlooked the advantages.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• Calamity, n. A more than commonly plain and unmistakable reminder that the affairs of this life are not of our own ordering.
  Calamities are of two kinds: misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others....
• Peace, n.: In international affairs, a period of cheating between two periods of fighting.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...