Related:

• Gunpowder and alcohol DO mix - but it tastes awful.
• When you discover you are dead, avoid driving a car.
• A New Yorker was driving through Berkeley when he saw a big crowd gathered by the side of the street.
  Curiousity got the better of him and he leaned out of his window to ask an onlooker what was going on....
• Wadlow: [lifts Nelson out of the sewer by his head] Do you find something comical about my appearance when I'm driving my automobile?
  Nelson: Yeah. Wadlow: Everyone needs to drive a vehicle, even the very tall....
• Q: How do you tell that your roommate's gay? A: When his cock tastes like shit.
• Progress results when you mix persistence with purpose.
• We three drunks from Omaha are Spending Christmas eve in a car.
  Driving, Drinking, glasses clinking; Who needs a lousy bar? -- Mad Magazine...
• Christmas time is here, by Golly; Kill the turkeys, ducks and chicke
  Disapproval would be folly; Mix the punch, drag out the Dicke...