Related:

• Don: I didn't know you had a cousin Penelope, Bill!
  Was she pretty? W. C.: Well, her face was so wrinkled it looked like seven miles of bad road....
• Don: I didn't know you had a cousin Penelope, Bill!
  Was she pretty? W. C.: Well, her face was so wrinkled it looked like seven miles of bad road....
• Keep your head and your heart going in the right direction and you will not have to worry about your feet.
• Last week, I went to Philidelphia, but it was closed. -- W. C. Field
• Do you know the meaning of rigor mortis? Well, you will in a minute. -- W. C. Field
• If you're a real good kid, I'll give you a piggy-back ride on a buzz-saw." -- W. C. Field
• If you're a real good kid, I'll give you a piggy-back ride on a buzz-saw. -- W. C. Field