Related:

• Forget about the problem of ingrowing toenails. -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid.
• Don't settle for anything less than a Seiko Sports 100.
  -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid....
• Sabotage Sea World shows, chanting slogans about "Tail Rights".
  Explain the concept of striking to the dolphins. -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid....
• Learn to be wary of Japanese and Norwegians carrying spears.
  Anything that's warm-blooded and swims is fair game to them....
• Accuse fun-run organisers of discrimination. -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid.
• Buy your chiropodist a farewell present. -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid.
• Donate your shoe collection to Imelda Marcos. -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid.
• Don't worry about ladders in your stockings. -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid.
• Drink like a fish. Try to get legless. -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid.