Related:

• About all some men accomplish in life is to send a son to Harvard.
• Oh backup Boy! Bring your tape drive over here and back up my flashy new disk drive now, won't you?
  I have a luncheon to attend to! - please send weapo...
• My mother made me a homosexual! If I send her the yarn, can she make me one too?
• I want you to stop quoting me out of context,' he said.
  `Printing my comments intact would make things much easier....
• I cannot read the fiery letters," said Frito Bugger in a quavering voice.
  "No," said GoodGulf, "but I can. The letters are Elvish, of course, of an ancient mode, but the language is that of Mordor, which I will not utter here....
• If you see the man who invented the wheel, send him up
  I want to give him a piece of my mind. Meddler!" -- Stranger in a Strange Land, Robert A....
• The teacher asked three boys to write an essay. She said, "Write on what you would do if you had a million dollars, and bring it in tomorrow.
  So the next day the three little boys came in. She said to the first boy, "Percy, this is a nice essay on what you'd do with a million dollars....