Related:

• Never sleep with anyone whose troubles are worse than your own.
• Never eat at a place called Mom's. Never play cards with a man named Doc.
  And never lie down with a woman who's got more troubles than you....
• The three rules of international air travel: (1) Never fly on Aeroflot if you can possibly avoid it (this used to be Braniff or Aeroflot).
  (2) Never bet a whole lot of money on two little pairs unless you know *exactly* what you're doing....
• Never trust anybody whose arm is bigger than your leg.
• Laugh at your troubles & you'll never run out of laughter.
• The avocation of assessing the failures of better men can be turned into a comfortable livelihood, providing you back it up with a Ph.
  D. -- Nelson Algre...