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• If you try to please everybody, somebody is not going to like it. -- Donald Rumsfeld
• You can't please everyone.
• If you are sure what you do will meet with everyone's approval, somebody won't like it.
  -- Chisholm, Third Law, Corollary 2...
• Chisolm's Third Law, Corollary 2: If you do something which you are sure will meet with everyone's approval, somebody won't like it.
• Marge: Please, Homer, can't we try it? [going to a sushi bar] Home
  No. Lisa: Please, Dad, this argument humiliates us both....
• Kirk: "Khan, you bloodsucker! You're going to have to do your own dirty work now!
  Do you hear me? *Do you?!" Khan: "Kirk...Kirk, you're still alive, my old friend....
• If you ever go temporarily insane, don't shoot somebody, like a lot of people do.
  Instead, try to get some weeding done, because you'd really be surprised....
• You use unfamiliar words -- please re-phrase it, or try something else.
• The number you have dialed is imaginary. Please divide by 0 and try again.