Related:

• Spencer's Laws of Accountancy: 1. Trial balances don't.
  2. Working capital doesn't. 3. Liquidity tends to run out. 4. Return on investments won't....
• Laws of Gardening 1) Other people's tools work only in other people's yards.
  2) Fanzy gizmos don't work. 3) If nobody uses it, there's a reason....
• This modem will now self destruct...5..4..3..2..1..0..
• Unix will self-destruct in five seconds... 4... 3... 2... 1...
• Laws of Computerdom According to Golub 1) Fuzzy project objectives are used to avoid the embarrassment of estimating the corresponding costs.
  2) A carelessly planned project takes three times longer to complete than expected...
• 1) Take an old record album cover. 2) Fill the insides with shaving cream.
  3) Place it halfway under a locked door to the victim's office, home, room, etc....
• 1) If what you're doing is working, keep doing it.
  (2) If what you're doing is not working, stop doing it....
• Ozman's Laws: (1) If someone says he will do something "without fail," he won't.
  (2) The more people talk on the phone, the less money they make....