Related:

• Aagh! Pink? Marge, I can't wear a pink shirt to work.
  Everybody wears white shirts. I'm not popular enough to be different....
• aga n. [WPI] A cuspy but bogus raving story about N random broken people.
  Here is a classic example of the saga form, as told by Guy L....
• How many Iraqi soldiers -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  One. He takes it back to Baghdad for safe keeping........
• If I was going to storm a pillbox, going to sheer, utte
  certain death, and the colonel said, "Shepherd, pick six guys," I'd pick six White Sox fans, because they have known death every day of their lives and it holds no terror for them....
• If someone tells you that the fully armored man of the Middle Ages was so encumbered by his armor that he could not rise if he fell
  you may well ask yourself, first, if it is reasonable to assume that professional soldiers would go on wearing armor that kept them from fighting and second, if this theory is in line with what you know of the heavily armored men of your personal acquaintance....
• INK, n. A villainous compound of tannogallate of iron, gum-arabic and water, chiefly used to facilitate the infection of idiocy and promote intellectual crime.
  The properties of ink are peculiar and contradictory...
• I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.
  -- Dick Gregory...
• NEW ALLIED WEAPONRY - FBT - Fucking-big tank. This tank is 150 feet wide and 200 feet long
  and it's purpose is to make the ground war much simplified by simply running over enemy soldiers....
• Bart: It's hard to see what's going on; I can only make out the fat soldiers.
  Skinner: All right, children, switch. [one of the soldiers spots the children] Man 4...