Related:

• A couple I know were discussing their wallpaper, which had just been hung.
  Dov was annoyed at Debby's indifference to what he felt was a poor job....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• A woman was married to a golfer. One day she asked, "If I were to die, would you remarry?
  After some thought, the man replied, "Yes, I've been very happy in this marriage and I would want to be this happy again....
• Do you think your father and I should have lived comfortably so long together if ever we had been married?
• Do you think your mother and I should have lived comfortably so long together if ever we had been married?
• I married beneath me -- all women do.
• I'm married to an English guy. He's a typical English guy.
  He's very reserved. In fact, it wasn't until after we were married that I actually knew he wanted to go out with me....
• Asked how she felt being the first woman to make a major-league team
  he said, "Like a pig in mud," or words to that effect, and then turned and released a squirt of tobacco juice from the wad of rum soaked plug in her right cheek....
• I think a man can have two, maybe three affairs while he is married.
  But three is the absolute maximum. After that, you are cheating. -- Yves Montand...