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• You know it's Monday when you wake up and it's Tuesday. -- Garfield
• You know it's Monday when you find a land mine in your food. -- Garfield
• You know it's Monday when you find sharks in your water bowl. -- Garfield
• You know it's going to be a rotten day when... you wake up face down on the pavement.
• You know it is going to be a rotten day when... You wake up to the soothing sound of flowing water.
  .. the day after you bought a waterbed....
• You know you've been hacking too long when... ...when you can't wake up in the morning because you forgot to push a return address on the stack the night before.
• You know you've been hacking too long when... ...you wake up and desperately try to start a compiler so you can use the 15 minute waiting period to sleep some more.
• You know you've been hacking too long when... ...you wake up at 3
  00am from a nightmare, and realize the reason for i...
• If you don't drink, when you wake up in the morning that's the best you're gonna feel all day.
  -- Martin Mull...