Related:

• Ultimately what's most lasting are those intimate moments that are so fleeting.
  Those magical, mystical moments where a man leaves himself and becomes one withanother person....
• How many cats -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need....
• 1. Avoid fried foods, which angry up the blood. 2. If your stomach disputes you, lie down and pacify it with cool thoughts.
  3. Keep the juices flowing by jangling around gently as you move....
• How many Aquarians -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Well, you have to remember that everything is energy so......
• A strange malaise suddenly afflicts you. You shiver with chill, and your muscles seem to turn to putty
  everything around you becomes grey and unreal. The fit quickly passes, and you find that your body has degenerated back to what it was like before you ate the spinach....
• Then there's the atmosphere -- half the time you can eat the air, it's got so much stuff floating around in it.
  It takes the edge out of the colors. Down here even the traffic lights are pastel....
• How many theoretical physicists -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  If you want to know how many, you can observe them as they come in the door....
• How many Aquarians -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Like, why don't you just get out of my face and stop asking me to do all your work for you?...
• If you are going to throw your weight around, you ought first to join an aerobics class, so you get something from your effort.