Related:

• You know you've been hacking too long when... ...you stop by the grocery store on your way home, and write your check out in hex.
• COBOL: the only programming language in which you can write a letter home to your folks and reasonably expect it to compile and run without errors.
• What do you make of these? Crystalline, mostly inert, nothing to write home about.
  -- Riker and Data, "The Last Outpost", stardate 41386.4...
• Dear Miss Manners: My home economics teacher says that one must never place one's elbows on the table.
  However, I have read that one elbow, in between courses, is all right....
• If I promise to miss you, will you go away?
• Time to go home and write mom a nice long letter.