Related:

• Joey: Hey, Monica bought a bed from the "Mattress King"?
  Phoebe: Yeah, so please, please, please, don't say anything to Chandler....
• Bart: Buy me Bonestorm or go to Hell! Marge: Bart! Home
  Young man, in this house, we use a little word called "please"....
• Marge: But you can't let a few bad experiences sour you on helping people.
  Lovejoy: Oh, sure I can. [the phone rings] [shudders] You handle it....
• Homer: So, Mr. Burns is gonna make us all go on a stupid corporate retreat up in the mountains to learn about _teamwork_.
  Which means we'll have to cancel our plans to hang around here....
• My ritual differs slightly. What I do, first thing [in the morning], is I hop into the shower stall.
  Then I hop right back out, because when I hopped in I landed barefoot right on top of See Threepio, a little plastic robot character from "Star Wars" whom my son, Robert, likes to pull the legs off of while he showers....
• The good ended happily and the bad ended unhappily.
  That is what fiction means. --Oscar Wilde, from The Importance of Being Earne...
• The devout Jew was beside himself because his son had been dating a shiksa, so he went to visit his rabbi.
  The rabbi listened solemnly to his problem, took his hand, and said, "Pray to God....
• What I do, first thing [in the morning], is I hop into the shower stall.
  Then I hop right back out, because when I hopped in I landed barefoot right on top of See Threepio, a little plastic robot character from "Star Wars" whom my son, Robert, likes to pull the legs off of while he showers....