Related:

• When a man and a women argue, it is often the stupidest of the two who thinks He has won.
• Here's a piece of late news. Mr. Arthur Perkiss, the man who this week won five hundred thousand pounds on the pools, has announced that he will never work another day in his life.
  So he's staying on with British Rail. -- Ronnie Corbe...
• There's a man deeply in debt, see, and he takes the money he has left and goes to Monte Carlo to try to recoup at the roulette tables.
  Won a little, lost a lot, and was down to his last franc....
• The old pool shooter has won many a game in his life.
  But now it was time to hang up the cue. When he did all the other cues came crashing to the floor....
• Honk if your team has never won The Stanley Cup.
• Reagan won because he ran against Jimmy Carter. Had he run unopposed he would have lost.
  -- Mort Sahl...
• Humanity has won its battle. Liberty now has a country.
  -- Marquis de Lafayette, on the birth of the United State...
• I won! I won!
• And all to leave what with his toil he won To that unfeather'd two-legged thing, a son.
  -- John Dryden (1631-1700) -- Absalom and Achitophel, Part i, Line 169...