Today I accidentally stepped on a snail on the sidewalk in front of our house.
And I thought, I too am like that snail. I build a defensive wall around
myself, a "shell" if you will. But my shell isn't made out of a hard,
protective substance. Mine is made out of tinfoil and paper bags.
-- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey
And I thought, I too am like that snail. I build a defensive wall around
myself, a "shell" if you will. But my shell isn't made out of a hard,
protective substance. Mine is made out of tinfoil and paper bags.
-- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey
Related:
- Sometimes, when I drive across the desert in the middle of the night,
with no other cars around, I start imagining: What... - Too bad when I was a kid there wasn't a guy in our class that everybody
called the "Cricket Boy",
because I would have liked to stand up in class and... - Instead of a trap door, what about a trap window? The guy looks out it,
and if he leans too far, he falls out. Wait. I guess... - Do you know what happens when you slice a golf ball in half?
Someone gets mad at you. I found this out the hard... - If I was being executed by injection, I'd clean up my cell real neat.
Then, when they came to get me, I'd say, "Injection... - I bet it was pretty hard to pick up girls if you had the Black Death.
Deep Thoughts by Jack... - Laugh, clown, laugh. This is what I tell myself whenever I dress up like Bozo.
Deep Thoughts by Jack... - If I ever get real rich, I hoe I'm not real mean to poor people,
like I am now. -- Deep Thoughts, by Jack... - If you're a young Mafia gangster out on your first date,
I bet it's really embarrassing if someone tries to...
From the same category:
- He said he was dying of fast women, slow horses,
crooked cards and straight whisky... - Be polite. Write diplomatically. Even in a declaration of war one observes
the rules politeness.
Otto Von... - I can see clearly now,
the brain is gone..... - Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the
Western Spiral arm of the Galaxy lies a small unregarded yellow sun.
Orbiting this at a distance of roughly ninety-eight... - The problems of the world cannot possibly be solved by skeptics or
cynics whose horizons are limited by the obvious realities.
We need men who can dream of things that never were...
