Related:

• Yo momma so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.
• The liberal of any species is always more dangerous -- because he always seems so much more rational.
  -- Solomon Sho...
• Sofa so Good: Chester Field
• A short speech is often a good speech and certainly has the advantage of being much less able to be a bad speech than a long speech.
  A long speech is often a bad speech precisely because it was not a short speech....
• A man enters a pet shop, seeking to purchase a parrot.
  He points to a fine colorful bird and asks how much it costs....
• INSECTICIDE Insecticide is a wondrous substance used to kill poor little innocent insects, whose only fault is that they like crapping in your food, nibbling on your skin, and buzzing around.
  But why use conventional insecticide when you can use DDT?...
• Lawyer: Krusty, have you _ever_ seen this so-called animation genius before?
  Krusty: Yes I have. Lawyer: [surprised] You have?...
• As surgeons keep their instruments and knives always at hand for cases requiring immediate treatme
  o shouldst thou have thy thoughts ready to understand things divine and human, remembering in thy every act, even the smallest, how close is the bond that unites the two....
• In making theories, always keep a window open so that you can throw one out if necessary.
  -- Bela Schick...