Related:

• Just as you reach the other side, the bridge buckles beneath the weight weight of the bear, which was still following you around.
  You scrabble scrabble desperately for support, but as the bridge collapses you stumble stumble back and fall into the chasm....
• You know you should be swimming when . . . Cats start following you around even when you *aren't* carrying groceries.
• And sometimes the bear eats you.
• Some days you eat the bear, and some days the bear eats you.
• Asses are made to bear and so are you!
• By following the good, you learn to be good.
• Haven't you heard about the BIG HUNGRY BEAR?
• On the internet, nobody knows you are a bear. -- Tovah Hollande