Related:

• One of the prison psychiatrists asked me if I thought sex was dirty, and I said it is if you're doing it right.
  -- Woody Allen, "Take the Money and Ru...
• A bird in the hand is a small meal for one.
• After fifteen minutes, I wanted to marry her, and after thirty minutes I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse.
  -- Woody Allen, "Take the Money and Ru...
• Ross Perot - one burrito short of a combo meal.
• It is a good rule of health that tells us that we should eat not one ounce more at any given meal than we are able to bench press easily.
• Breakfast n.-first meal of the day, wheat beer'n pretzels.
• Mountain Dew and doughnuts... because breakfast is the most important meal of the day.
• How many Tauruses -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  One. But only if they can celebrate afterwards with a ten course meal and some great sex....
• Take no prisoners.