Related:

• I was in Tennessee and they hated me. They knew I came in from California.
  A guy stood up and said, "At least here in Tennessee we don't drive all over our freeways and shoot and kill people!...
• Homer: Listen here: my name is Homer J. Simpson. You guys think I'm dead, but I'm not.
  Now I want you to straighten this out without a lot of your bureaucratic red tape and mumbo- jumbo!...
• The question is rather: if we ever succeed in making a mind 'of nuts and bolts', how will we know we have succeeded?
  -- Fergal Toomey It will tell us. -- Barry Ko...
• I was in bed one night when my boyfriend Ernie said, "How come you never tell me when you're having an orgasm?
  I said to him, "Ernie, you're never around." -- Bette Midle...
• Love is never jealous or envious. Tell THAT to my boyfriend!
• How many sex therapists -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Two - one to screw it in and one to tell him he's screwing it in the wrong way....
• We were young and our happiness dazzled us with its strength.
  But there was also a terrible betrayal that lay within me like a Merle Haggard song at a French restaurant....