Related:

• Semi-conductor - one who directs 18 wheelers.
• My parents sent my brother through law school. He graduated.
  Now he's suing them for wasting seven years of his life. -- Mike Binde...
• 50% of the high school graduates in this country graduated in the bottom half of their class.
• The following appeared in a memo from the chairperson of the school board in the town of Saluda.
  "For the past five years, Mr. Charles Schade has been the music director at Steel City High School, and during that time the school band from Steel City High has won three regional band competitions....
• Oral Roberts is sure the end is near, but he has hired two extra people to work on his listeners, to put him into their will!
• Bart: Wait a minute, whoa, whoa. [whistles to call the orchestra's attention] Stop the music.
  [they do] Where's dad? [the Simpsons begin to look] "Lisa...
• The following appeared in a letter to the editor of a local newspaper.
  "The members of the town school board should not be reelected because they are not concerned about promoting high-quality education in the arts in our local schools....
• If it's so safe to fly, why do they give you an hour of instructions when you get on the plane?
  Have safety instructions where you know it's dangerous to travel--like the New York City subway system....
• No one has right to destroy another person's belief by demanding empirical evidence.
  -- Ann Landers, nationally sindicated advice columnist -- and Director at Handgun Control Inc....