Related:

• DIAGNOSIS, n. A physician's forecast of the disease by the patient's pulse and purse.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• GOUT, n. A physician's name for the rheumatism of a rich patient.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• He laughs best who laughs least. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary
• PLEASURE, n. The least hateful form of dejection. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary
• PHYSICIAN, n. One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our dogs when well.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder.
  This disease, like _caries_ and many other ailments, is prevalent only among civilized races living under artificial conditio...
• RED-SKIN, n. A North American Indian, whose skin is not red -- at least not on the outside.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• MARTYR, n. One who moves along the line of least reluctance to a desired death.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• ACCORD, n. Harmony. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary