Related:

• DEGRADATION, n. One of the stages of moral and social progress from private station to political preferment.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• PRESBYTERIAN, n. One who holds the conviction that the government authorities of the Church should be called presbyters.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• DRUIDS, n. Priests and ministers of an ancient Celtic religion which did not disdain to employ the humble allurement of human sacrifice.
  Very little is now known about the Druids and their faith....
• HUSBAND, n. One who, having dined, is charged with the care of the plate.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• PATRIOT, n. One to whom the interests of a part seem superior to those of the whole.
  The dupe of statesmen and the tool of conquerors. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• PRIVATE, n. A military gentleman with a field-marshal's baton in his knapsack and an impediment in his hope.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• PRIMATE, n. The head of a church, especially a State church supported by involuntary contributions.
  The Primate of England is the Archbishop of Canterbury, an amiable old gentleman, who occupies Lambeth Palace when living and Westminster Abbey when dead....
• HEBREW, n. A male Jew, as distinguished from the Shebrew, an altogether superior creation.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• INJURY, n. An offense next in degree of enormity to a slight.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...