Related:

• You could have a cheap car radio fitted while you waited, and if you turned your back for a couple of minutes, it would be removed while you waited as well.
  -- About King's Cross Statio...
• Arrange your life so that you don't have to be present.
• For your birthday, somebody gives you a calfskin wallet..
• VIRGO August 23 - September 22 You are very methodical and do things in order.
  On the other hand, your personal appearance is usually a mess....
• A vivid and creative mind characterizes you. Too bad you can't keep your mind on the down to earth things.
• You may be redneck... if both your dog and your wallet are on a chain.
• Before you unburden yourself of your problems, recall to mind that half the people to whom you tell these could not care less, but if they could, they would make the effort.
  The other half, to whom you might unburden yourself, are happy to hear of your misfortunes, thinking that finally, you are getting what you deserve....
• I think you had better start lining your hat with tinfoil.
• Be careful when you bite into your hamburger. -- Derek Bok