Related:

• Pedro Guerrero was playing third base for the Los Angeles Dodgers in 1984 when he made the comment that earns him a place in my Hall of Fame.
  Second baseman Steve Sax was having trouble making his throws....
• I hope you millionaires are having fun! I just invested half your life savings in yeast!
  ! -- Zippy the Pinhead...
• Are you having fun? I am.
• I have just learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy.
  First, let her think she's having her way. And second, let her have it. -- Lyndon B. Johnso...
• You can't steal second base while keeping one foot on first.
• You can't steal second base and keep one foot on first.
• Once upon a time, there were five blind men who had the opportunity to experience an elephant for the first time.
  One approached the elephant, and, upon encountering one of its sturdy legs, stated, "Ah, an elephant is like a tree....
• Stalin was dying, and summoned Khruschev to his bedside.
  Wheezing his last words with difficulty, Stalin tells Khruschev, "The reins of the country are now in your hands....
• I was in bed one night when my boyfriend Ernie said, "How come you never tell me when you're having an orgasm?
  I said to him, "Ernie, you're never around." -- Bette Midle...