Related:

• Did you hear about the newfie woman who couldn't get pregnant twice because she blew the both of them.
• You can never trust a woman; she may be true to you.
• Did you hear about the meanest man in the world didn't tell his wife he was sterile until she got pregnant.
• Don't tell a woman she's pretty; tell her there's no other woman like her, and all roads will open to you.
  -- Jules Renard...
• Never be possessive. If a female friend lets on that she is going out with another man, be kind and understanding.
  If she says she would like to go out with the Dallas Cowboys, including the coaching staff, the same rule applies....
• Never tell a woman she doesn't look good in some article of clothing she has just purchased.
  -- Lewis Grizzard...
• A woman is like a tea bag--you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.
  -- Nancy Reaga...
• Gifts for Children -- This is easy. You never have to figure out what to get for children, because they will tell you exactly what they want.
  They spend months and months researching these kinds of things by watching Saturday- morning cartoon-show advertisements....