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• My mother loved children -- she would have given anything if I had been one.
  -- Groucho Marx...
• I wish to be cremated. One tenth of my ashes shall be given to my agent, as written in our contract.
  Groucho Marx...
• On the old "You Bet Your Life" program, Groucho Marx was getting to know one of his contestants.
  The man told Groucho that he had 10 children. "Why so many children?...
• Operator give me a wrong number, I want to talk to my mother-in-law. -- Groucho Marx (1890-1977)
• If Karl, instead of writing a lot about Capital, had made a lot of Capital, it would have been much better.
  -- Karl Marx's Mothe...