Related:

• Mixed emotions is when your kid gets an "A" in sex class.
• A New Yorker is riding down the road in his new Mercedes.
  So intent is he on the cocaine in his hand he completely misses a turn and his car plunges over the five-hundred-foot cliff to be smashed into pieces at the bottom....
• May you outlive everyone but your mother-in-law.
• Happiness is seeing your mother-in-law's face on the back of a milk carton.
• mixed emotions: Watching a bus-load of lawyers plunge off a cliff. With five empty seats.
• Definition of mixed emotions: Finding out your ex-wife accepted a Kirby Award on your behalf in San Diego.
  -- Dave Sim...
• Oh, Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz? My friends all have Porsche
  I must make amends. -- Janis Jopli...
• A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you're really thinking about a mother.
  -- Cliff Claven, Chee...
• Love is when you look into your lover's eyes and see God smiling back at you. -- Solomon Sho