Related:

• Many a wife thinks her husband is the world's greatest lover. But she can never catch him at it.
• A lover teaches a wife all that her husband has concealed from her.
• A man arrived home early to find his wife in the arms of his best friend, who swore how much they were in love.
  To quiet the enraged husband, the lover suggested, "Friends shouldn't fight, let's play gin rummy....
• She 's adorned Amply that in her husband's eye looks lovely,-- The truest mirror that an honest wife Can see her beauty in.
  -- John Tobin (1770-1804) -- The Honeymoon, Act iii, Sc. 4...
• My wife thinks I'm too nosy. At least that's what she keeps scribbling in her diary.
  -- Drake Sathe...
• American culture is based on the automobile, and any young man of promise is going to own one and want to travel great distances in it.
  Consequently, any young woman of aspiration should expect to spend most of her vacations in a car, probing into unfamiliar corners....
• That wife of mine is a liar," said the angry husband to a sympathetic pal seated next to him in a bar.
  "How do you know?" the friend asked. "She didn't come home last night, and when I asked her where she'd been she said she'd spent the night with her sister Shirley....
• Florence Flask was ... dressing for the opera when she turned to her husband and screamed, "Erlenmeyer!
  My joules! Someone has stolen my joules!" "Now, now, my dear," replied her husband, "keep your balance and reflux a moment....