Related:

• The Worst Musical Trio There are few bad musicians who have a chance to give a recital at a famous concert hall while still learning the rudiments of their instrument.
  This happened about thirty years ago to the son of a Rumanian gentleman who was owed a personal favour by Georges Enesco, the celebrated violinist....
• Kid: Sorry, it's league night. I couldn't give a lane to my own mother.
  Doris: [walking by] I have no son. [walks off] -- Even if she disowns me, "Team Home...
• Smithers: [chuckles] Perfect. When I give the signal, you transfer the call to Mr.
  Burns. After she tears into him I'll rush in and save the day....
• Skinner: Now, Bart, son. I don't know what you think you saw .
  .. but, uh ... let me assure you... Krabappel...
• Mother seemed pleased by my draft notice. "Just think of all the people in England, they've chosen you, it's a great honour, son.
  Laughingly I felled her with a right cross. -- Spike Milliga...
• A Southern boy graduates from high school heads north to college, taking the family dog, Old Blue with him, for company.
  He's only been there a few weeks when he gets a call from his girlfriend...
• Imagine what we can imagine! -- Arthur Rubinstei
• Two parent drops spent months teaching their son how to be part of the ocean.
  After months of training, the father drop commented to the mother drop, "We've taught our boy everything we know, he's fit to be tide....
• Our documentation manager was showing her two year old son around the office.
  He was introduced to me, at which time he pointed out that we were both holding bags of popcorn....