Related:

• Under the most carefully controlled conditions of scheduling, programming, and con security, the fen will do what they damn well please.
• Q. What do elephants and giraffes have in common? A.
  They both have long necks, except for the elephants....
• Please! Do not break character!
• How many elephants -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  Only one, but it has to stand on a trunk to do it....
• Why do five pins seem like a little, but five elephants seem like a lot?
• ...If I seem to give a damn, please tell me. I would hate to be giving the wrong impression.
• If I seem to give a damn, please tell me. I would hate to be giving the wrong impression.
• Lightning strikes.
• Please do Not: Fold, Spindle, or Cogitate