Related:

• When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.
  -- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey...
• Clinton: You know, Senator, being in suspended animation gave me time to think.
  Partisan politics are tearing our country apart. Dole...
• Kang: The politics of failure have failed. We need to make them work again.
  Tomorrow, when you are sealed in the voting cubicle, vote for me, Senator Ka....
• I'd quit the job of being me, but I have accumulated so much seniority. -- Tom Wilson ("Ziggy")
• A mind is a terrible thing to ...uhhh...I forget...
• Phoebe: I don't know how to say this, but I think when your wife's spirit left her body, it um, kind of stuck around in me.
  Mr. Adelman: You're saying, my wife is in you? Phoebe...
• You know Marge, getting old is a terrible thing. I think the saddest day of my life was when I realized I could beat my Dad at most things, and Bart experienced that at the age of four.
  -- Homer, "Moaning Lisa...
• It's kinda funny. When I see my name anywhere, it's (often) the '60's this or the '60's that.
  I can't figure out sometimes if people think I'm dead or alive" -- Bob Dylan, 1985 interview...
• They call us "coaches." The job is to remind your wife to breathe.
  Think about that for a second. You realize exactly how worthless I am in this thing?...