Related:

• May your mother-in-law treat you like her own child and move in with you.
• This is a new ship, boy, but she's got the right name.
  Now you remember that, you hear? "I will, sir." You treat her like a lady....
• Treat every woman as if you have slept with her and you soon will.
• She's such a kinky girl, The kind you don't take home to mother.
  She will never let your spirits down Once you get her off the street....
• Once upon a time there was a beautiful young girl taking a stroll through the woods.
  All at once she saw an extremely ugly bull frog seated on a log and to her amazement the frog spoke to her....
• It is always preferable to visit home with a friend.
  Your parents will not be pleased with this plan, because they want you all to themselves and because in the presence of your friend, they will have to act like mature human beings....
• If you MUST get married, it is always advisable to marry beauty.
  Otherwise, you'll never find anybody to take her off your hands....
• Lisa: Ahem. [Marge waits for her to say something, but Lisa turns away] Marge
  Now Lisa, listen to me, this is important. I want you to smile today....
• Well I looked at my watch and it said a quarter to five, The headline screamed that I was still alive, I couldn't understand it, I thought I died last night.
  I dreamed I'd been in a border town, In a little cantina that the boys had found, I was desperate to dance, just to dig the local sounds....