I Said To My Old Husband, "I'm Gonna Take You Out Into The Country For A Picnic.

Related:

• The teacher asked three boys to write an essay. She said, "Write on what you would do if you had a million dollars, and bring it in tomorrow.
  So the next day the three little boys came in. She said to the first boy, "Percy, this is a nice essay on what you'd do with a million dollars....
• Once upon a time, a four-year-old boy was visiting his uncle and aunt.
  He was a very outspoken little boy and ofttimes had to be censured to say the right thing at the right time....
• A five-year-old kid raised his hand at school. The teacher declined to let him leave the room.
  Five minutes later she reversed herself. She said, "All right, Sonny, you may go now....
• I used to call [Count Basie] one of my lawyers. He would give me such beautiful advice.
  And he would phrase that advice into these little sayings....
• George Washington, father of our country. George Washington, when he was just a child, just a boy, honesty was his trademark.
  The classic story we all remember was when George Washington's father came up to George and said, "George Washington--father of our country--my son--I want to ask you a question....
• A horrible little boy came up to me and said, `You know in your book The Martian Chronicles?
  ' I said, `Yes?' He said, `You know where you talk about Deimos rising in the East?...
• I was talking to a businessman, and I said, "Don't you think most men are little boys?
  And he said, "I'm no little boy! I make seventy-five thousand dollars a year....
• Homer: Welcome to the Simpson residence or "casa de Simpson," as I call it.
  Grimes: Yeah, what did you want to see me about, Simpson?...
• If It Ain't Country, It Ain't Music! 'Nuff Said I Think.