Related:

• I take my wife everywhere...but she keeps coming back.
• I took my cat in for a catscan. Diagnosis? It was a cat.
• I [] My Dog. I [] My Cat.
• My cat got my tounge and she won't give it back!
• Marge: Homer, I think the baby is coming. Homer: Wow.
  A baby and a free burger. Could this be the best day of my life?...
• Nobody talks about my failures anymore, just my successes.
  In my 30 expeditions to 8000ers 12 times I failed....
• I [] my dog, I [] my cat, and I [] baby harp seals.
• Home is where I feed my cat.
• I have my cat's permission to use the computer.